Symptom or Sin?

This last week has been particulary difficult. Sunday evening my left shoulder started 'tremoring' (for lack of a better word) and with it comes even more tiredness and soreness than just a wrist or stutter. This unpleasant 'jerking' takes more energy and has just wiped me out - physically and mentally.

Three weeks ago when the stutter started, I was noticing that I was having great difficulty being patient with anyone or anything. The galloping grumps (as we call them) were not just galloping but taking off on a jet plane. I find that it takes all my energy to give a short quick answer and not bite anyone's head off.

So here's the question that I'm wrestling with. Is it a symptom along with the tremors and stutter or is it sin or a combination of both?

It would be so nice (and much easier) to say it was just a symptom and to justify that I'm dealing with a lot physically and with interrupted sleep it is not easy on the best of days. But is that the truth?

As I go through this day, with floods of emotion from anger to tears and everything inbetween,
I know that God is in control of this. I know that. I just don't feel it today.
I know that God has a plan and purpose in this. I just don't know what it is.
I know that God loves me and cares for me and hears my prayers. I just don't feel that today either.

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